“I love him not, I hate him not”

Review of SZA’s “SOS”

SZA — SOS (2022)

Released December 9, 2022

First, I want to say this is my first time listening to a SZA record. I‘ve heard of her, heard a few clips on TikTok, but this is the first time I’m sitting down and playing through a full album of hers. The first time around, I didn’t get it. And that’s okay, not all albums are made for all people. Sometimes they’re not for people who are outside of the genre culture it sits in, or for people who are unfamiliar with an artists’ previous work, or sometimes they’re just not for people who can’t relate to what the artist is singing about. All of these were true for me when I first listened to the album. But upon a second listen, it clicked.

The biggest thing I was impressed with on this record was SZA’s vocals. From the very first song, she is delivering. The whole album thematically is her yo-yoing between two different modes of feeling — feeling free now that she’s out of this relationship (“Smoking on My Ex Pack”) to knowing that as much as she loves him, she has to leave, (“Open Arms”) from wanting to kill her ex (“Kill Bill”) to wanting to be his number one (“Snooze”), and from destroying everything herself and hating to have to do it to him (“Seek & Destroy”) to telling him he’s already lost her. (“Gone Girl”) Even though the songs are eclectic in sound, the subject matter feels a bit repetitive as it feels like every other song, she’s either wanting his love and attention or happy to be free of him.

The album opens with the title track “SOS,” which is all about hyping up the listener for what’s to come and as she writes “This ain’t no warning shot,” she isn’t holding back. After presumably working on this for the past five years since her debut CTRL, she says “I cried and cried/Said what’s on my mind.” That line in particular, paired with “All the pain I know/Is used to fuel my soul” from “Seek & Destroy” gets to the crux of what this album is about.

My favorite tracks are “F2F,” “Low,” “Special” and “Too Late.” I had heard “I Hate U” and “Kill Bill” online before I heard the full album so they didn’t hit me as hard as they might have had I not already been familiar with them. I imagine they did pack a punch for those who heard them as singles or right when the album was released. I didn’t love the lyrics on “Blind” or “Conceited.” I was actually a bit disappointed by the lyrics generally, even on songs that I liked sonically.

Circling back to “Kill Bill” for a minute, it reminds me so much of a murder ballad a la “Goodbye Earl” or “Before He Cheats” but in a different style. It also reminded me of Renee Rapp, who seems like a kindred artist, particularly with her style of direct, biting, and at times hostile lyrics. (I’m specifically thinking about “Poison Poison” and “Tummy Hurts”) I would love to see them collaborate on a whole project or even just one song together.

Overall, this album was a bit long which made it hard to distinguish some songs from others and I felt like I was waiting for the big resolving moment to hit but it never did. As I wrote at the start, this was my first proper introduction to SZA and I’m definitely feeling inspired to go back to her first record and give it a listen. I do think I will come back to this album, at least for a few songs, and if I’m ever feeling particularly vengeful, this will be the perfect soundtrack.